Eight Letters
by Sa'ash
Summary: How can Eight little letters change your life?
1. Sunsets

I was inspired to write this story after I heard "Losing my Religion" by Lacuna Coil. I feel like Liono and Tygra are destined to always have true happiness, but they didn't start out with happiness, they had to earn it, and this story, is the incarnation of that concept. Eight letters to save a life.

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><p>Why does everything have to turn out this way? This cliff, watching the sunset alone; I thought I was past all of this. There's nothing for me in the city below, and sometimes I really believe that falling into the city from up here would make me better off than walking back down there like I do every other time. I've fallen into the same depressing routine. Class in the morning with Father, followed by a lesson in etiquette with Jaga, followed by training with one of the instructors at the barracks.<p>

And here I thought being a Prince would be fun at least part of the time. I don't do the things I normally do anymore. Ever since my Father found out that I had been sneaking away into the city when I skipped my lessons, he decided to fill my schedule with even more worthless things to keep me so occupied that I wouldn't have the chance to slip out of the Palace.

The sun was making its final wave to Thundaria, the last glints of yellow and orange cascading over the horizon and making the people looking know that night was mere moments away. I closed my eyes when the brilliance left the sky, leaving only the stars above to flicker on and contrast against the dark sky. I could never get comfortable up here, none of the trees I visited would ever let me be at peace for even the slightest moment. It's like they obeyed my Father as well, never giving me a moment to relax.

Speaking of never giving me a moment to relax, the familiar crunches of grass under feet came up behind me, followed by silence. I knew perfectly well who was standing on the other side of the tree. The Tiger had made a habit of keeping an eye on me recently, most likely at Father's request.

He coughed to get my attention, and at first I ignored him. But when he called "Liono," I knew he wouldn't' be entertained by my apathy for long. He came around the tree and stared down at me, a frown covering his lips as his eyebrows raised in an expression that seemed to mimic worry. He had gotten better at his acting skills; then again he did go to all of his classes.

Sighing, I finally got up and walked around the other side to slump my way down the path. He called after me again, and I stopped long enough to look at him, the face I wore nowadays seeming to unnerve him a little. I knew that it agitated him to see me so mellow, so transient. He had asked me on more than one occasion if everything was alright, but he would only ever receive the same answer from me.

He knew of course, that behind every "I'm okay," that there was something else entirely. There was a darkness that had overcome me recently. I rarely felt anything anymore, the constant pressure put on me by both my Father and Thundaria had killed off all the nerves I had. I had already collapsed under the weight, and it seemed that Tygra was the only one who noticed just how broken I was becoming.

When he didn't say anything more, I turned to continue my drudging, sliding soundlessly along the Earth, my breath's unnoticed on the wind, my eyes blending into the blackness above. I had lost everything that gave me color. There was no more fun, no more passion. All that existed in this shell anymore was only sorrow, and depression. How could my Father have such high expectations for me, how could I be put under so much strain. I can understand that a Prince has duties, but he should also be able to make his own priorities. When you are given your objectives for life and forced to abide that list; guards and clerics accompanying you everywhere to make sure you are doing what you are supposed to.

There was no more time for myself, these little expeditions at night were the last little bit of the old me I clung to like a child with a blanket. I wished that everything could go back to the way they were before. I longed to have myself back, but I wasn't listening when I called my own name. I couldn't find where I left myself, and it seemed I had fallen into a pit with no chance of escape.

Whereas I was soundless now, Tygra's footsteps could be clearly heard, each tentative grind of his feet on the dirt coming loud over the swish of the breeze. I had a mind to tell him to leave me alone, but that would have been stupid. We are both going to the same place anyways. He would always come find me, and take me straight to my Father, who would always yell and nag me for sneaking out. That was often followed by me being locked in my room the next day, all of my lessons occurring there instead of their appropriate room in the palace.

I knew my routine now, and had gotten clever enough to know that nothing is going to change now. I was forced into this, and forced to stay here. Even as I stalked up the steps to the Palace door, I felt no fear like I used to when I had been caught. I felt nothing anymore, remember?

Even before he would tell me, I began walking in the opposite direction of my room, the all-too-familiar hallway which led to the throne room well worn after having been walked on by this one particular Lion so much. Tygra called for me again, but I ignored him, my hand already pressed to the hard wood, giving it a gentle push to slid it along the carpet. I kept my head down as I walked along the floor, the candles that had been lit were too bright for me.

I could hear the deep breaths of the man sitting in the large chair on the opposite end of the room, and kneeled in the customary fashion before him. I waited for him to start yelling, trying to take in as much of the silence as I could before It was broken by a monstrous and overpowering voice. Instead of a booming yell, however, I was only met with "Liono, what's wrong?"

"You called for me?" He knew perfectly well what was wrong. Everything I did nowadays was wrong to him.

"I don't remember doing such." If he hadn't called for me, then why did Tygra come to get me tonight? I could have stayed there a little longer, and sighed deeply. If I hadn't of spoken, you wouldn't even know I was there, and when I left, no one would ever know I had been there. I turned to walk out, if Father had no business with me tonight, then I wouldn't make him have any. He called for me again, receiving my sigh as I turned back around to stand facing the chair.

"What is the matter Liono?" As far as he was concerned, nothing was the matter, everything was perfectly fine as he wanted it. As far as I was concerned, however, was another matter I'm sure he had no patience for.

"Nothing Father, I thought I heard you summon me." He had gotten up from his throne and walked towards me now. The fear I thought lost sparked a little, and I hoped, for once, that he didn't ask to see my face, if he did, then our situation would move from "no business" into "immediate business."

Knowing how terrible my luck was though, I wasn't even surprised when he asked me to look at him. I raised my head slowly, and even before he could see all of it, I saw his eyes visibly widen and twitch. He could see how red and puffy my own were, he could see the dark bags underneath, each shade of purple attributed to a night of sleeplessness. If he wasn't looking at either of those traits I wore now, then I'm sure he must have been looking at how listless my eyes had become. The old turquoise irises I was always complemented on were traded in for opaque lenses the color of rotted moss.

"What happened to you?" I couldn't resist narrowing my eyes at him. How I would have reveled in telling him that he was what happened to me. I was past such a rebellious stage though, and simply told him that I had fallen into some ivy in the garden. He looked all but amused by the answer.

When he said nothing, I turned again to leave, and this time, he did not stop me. My head fell back down when I had entered the hallway, but the heat of those crimson eyes on my back lingered still. Tygra was still standing outside the door, but otherwise said nothing either.

I couldn't tell if he had went inside the room behind me or just closed the door. My answer came when I heard him address Father as such and ask him for a moment to talk about me. Of course Father had time for his favorite son, even if that son was adopted. I felt my interest perk for the first time in weeks, and halted my steps in the hallway, turning my head so my ear was facing the door. Their muffled voices were a strain to hear, and I had already moved back to the door before I realized what I was doing.

"Father, you saw Liono, there is something obviously wrong with him."

"That goes without saying Tygra, but do you know what is the matter?"

"Do you believe he'd tell me if I asked, you know how feels about me."

"Certainly not how you feel about him."

"Father, please, now is not the time for that conversation. Liono isn't well, and we should be concerning ourselves with how to help him at the moment."

"I agree, but what do you suggest we do if he will tell us nothing?"

"I have no idea, but I believe that part of the problem is his schedule."

"His schedule is such because he can't be trusted to attend his lessons when he has time to avoid them."

"At least when Liono had that time he felt better."

"I will not let Liono grow up into a lazy King who shirks his responsibilities."

"But you're letting him grow up to become a depressed king who would lead his people to grave along with himself."

"You watch your tone boy."

"If this is how I can help Liono then I will do what is necessary, and if It means objecting to how you are treating him then I will do so. You are chaining him too tightly to the Throne, he can't breathe under all of this pressure you continue to pile onto him."

"Now see here…"

"No! I know that this is part of the problem, why can't you understand that all he needs is some time to himself now and then. I admit that he can be reckless and wild when left to his own devices, but can you tell me that you do not prefer that version of him over this one?"

"…"

"Father, please, loosen the reins a little, if for me if not even for your real son."

"How bold of you to speak to me as such. Perhaps I will consider. It's a shame that Liono will never know how much you truly care for him."

"It is as I have asked for it to be. If he knew that I loved him then…"

"Don't you think you'd be better off getting that burden off your chest Tygra, don't you think Liono has a right to know?"

"I'm almost certain that he isn't interested Father, I don't want to confuse him, it'd only be another stress he'd have to deal with, it'd be counterproductive to what I'm trying to achieve."

"And what would that be?"

"I'm trying to make his life as easy as possible, he deserves better than how he's treated now, and Ive been doing my best to help him. But he just, doesn't want anything to do with me."

"Then perhaps your heart is misplaced."

"No, my heart is in the right place, as long as it's in Liono's hands, I will be happy. Sometimes though, I wish I could hold his, if only for a moment."

W-What…? I couldn't believe this, out of everything I knew about the Tiger, never once had I noticed this side of him. How long had he felt this way, I couldn't focus enough to think about it. I caught up to reality just as I head feet coming back toward the door. Tygra was bidding Father a good night, and the words were returned. I had to turn on my heels and sprint down the hall, as quietly as I could. I wasn't going to make it to the corner, so I slowed myself down and noticed a mirror along this side of the hallway.

I looked into it to make it seem as though I had become preoccupied with my reflection. In a sense I had; my eyes had a glimmer again, I hadn't seen them like this in so long, I wasn't even sure that it wasn't just a trick of the dim light cast from the sconces. I picked up a gasp in the air, and turned slightly to see Tygra and Father both standing at the door, their eyes wide and staring straight at me.

"Liono?" Tygra called out to me, and I moved my eyes to look at him. I hummed a "hmm" at him, and he opened his mouth, the closed it, finally opening it again and asking me how long I had been there.

"Too long, or perhaps long enough." I could see his eyes grow, and saw Father cross his arms and speak to me as well.

"You know about eavesdropping Liono…"

"You know about giving someone enough time to walk away." His eyes narrowed as they met mine, it felt nice to talk back to him again. I hadn't done it in so long, I felt a temporary thrill run up my spine. It broke some of the sadness off of my back and I felt relived, if only slightly. I sighed though when nothing else was said. With nothing to keep me thrilled, the weight I had broken off was easily replaced, and I slouched when it came back.

It didn't matter to me whether they had anything else to say or not, I felt tired for once, and only wanted the lightless space which was my room. I just wanted to meld into the shadows and sleep the pain away, I had been holding it in all day, I needed to let it out now, but I couldn't do it here.

Even when I heard both of them call for me to stop, I kept moving, my legs dragging on the carpet and making hideously shuffling sounds as I walked along the halls to the room at the farthest end of the palace, the room in the very back, my room. I thought I heard a cracking sound coming from somewhere in the palace, followed by several thumps of feet on the floor, they seemed to get closer, but when I turned, I didn't see anything, just the empty hallway behind me.

I got to my room, shrugging off the noise as probably a servant up going to the bathroom or something like that. It wasn't completely believable, but I was too tired to come up with anything better. I couldn't even close the door right. I was so sure I heard it click behind me, but when I heard it swing open, I sighed in frustration and closed it again, this time making sure it was closed and locking it.

I leaned my back against the wood. This was the only real time I was ever alone. This was the only time I could do what I want; what I wanted most right now, was to relieve some of the pain. My escape was sitting on my dressing table, the small bottle corked temptingly. I moved over to it, unable to wait any longer, picking up the small clear vial and pulling the cork off, inhaling the herbal aroma coming from inside. But as I lifted the bottle to my lips, I found myself struggling to hold onto it. It felt like there was something pulling my arm away.

I relaxed my arm, and the pressure was gone. Every time I tried to lift the bottle again though, it was there. I had no idea what it was, but whenever I tried touching the pressure on my arm, it mysteriously vanished. Regardless, it was becoming a chore to take my medicine, and as much I wanted the mindless euphoria it gave me, it wasn't worth this strain.

I sighed disappointedly and set the bottle back down, tossing the cork after it and sitting on the stool in front of the mirror. My eyes had lost the glimmer I saw in the hallway. I saw it right after Tygra and Father's dialogue. I wondered about whether the Tiger really meant those things he said. I shook the thought from my mind. "If he was really trying to make my life easy, then things would have already changed, he is father's favorite after all."

If I couldn't have my medicine to help me get through all of this new stress, then there was always a more reliable aid I kept on hand. The shiny metal sat at the top of the drawer as I opened it, fingering the edge of the object like a lover as I grabbed it and set it in front of me. I found out how effective this way was at reliving pain a while ago, at first by accident, but the results weren't to be argued with once I figured out how to do this the right way.

Gripping the bottom of my shirt, I pulled it off, letting it drop to the floor and eyeing myself in the mirror. The small muscles I maintained were barely noticeable, and you couldn't even see half of them, you'd have to touch them to even know they were there. What you could see though, were the little lines I had scratched into my side, some short, some long, and going every direction. I hesitated a moment to look at them myself, bending my head down and lifting my arm to get a good look at just what I had done. I could have sworn I felt something extremely light brush against the marks, but attributed it to some draft I figured was in here.

It felt good while I was dragging the blade across the skin, it stung when I was done, and felt fine after I had laid down for awhile. I subconsciously reached my hand out to pick up the knife from the table, but I couldn't feel it. I looked back up and I couldn't see it either. I knew I had set it down there, and looked around for it. I checked my feet in case it fell, but it was not there.

This was not right. I checked the drawer to make sure I hadn't imagined taking the knife out, but it wasn't in there either. I got up and walked around, first the medicine, and that touch, now the knife, this was not coincidence. I remembered the door as well, and before that the sounds I heard. Even though I was tired beyond belief, It was no trouble piecing together something that sounded believable enough.

"Tygra?" I didn't receive an answer, of course I wouldn't, it's naïve to believe that you'll get a response out of someone if they are stalking you. I walked around the room with my hands out, trying to grab who I thought was in here with me. I couldn't find anything at all, the semi-darkness already making it difficult to see.

The moon shining through the window was no help either, and as I wandered aimlessly, I realized that I was probably hallucinating everything. My eyes were burning and their lids felt as heavy as iron plates. I shook my head to clear the fog I thought I saw creeping in my periphery and looked around. There was nothing here, I was just imagining everything. I sighed and sat on the edge of my bed.

To think, I had fallen to low as to make myself believe I had company after so long. I was alone, I was too alone, and I could feel it working its way up tonight. The tears shed from my eyes in little streams, running down my cheek and dripping onto my pants. I was a sorry excuse for a Prince, I didn't deserve this, all I wanted was to be happy, but it seemed like I couldn't balance everything like I needed to make it work.

"Why is this so hard?" I crawled into bed, hoping I wasn't hallucinating this time, and sighing through my tears when I felt the sheets against my back as I lay there, eyes running and shirtless. It was cold this time of year, but the chill already existed inside me, so there was no use trying to hide from it under the covers.

When I felt calm enough to finally try and get to sleep, I turned onto my side and curled up into a ball. I wasn't sure why I decided to do this, but it felt right, and it made me feel comfortable. I missed feeling those things these days, and I took them as gifts whenever I was lucky enough to have them.

I drifted faster than I normally would have, the room warmed up a little, but it was still chilly. I knew I wouldn't be able to leave this room if I got sick, and I reached my arm back to grab a blanket I kept on top of the covers whenever I needed a quick nap but didn't want to get all the way in bed. Before I was sure I grabbed it, I felt it laid over me gently and pulled up to my neck. I looked around the room one more time. I was so sure there was someone in here, my arm was still stretched out behind me, but after everything else that had happened tonight, I wouldn't be surprised if this was just a dream right now.

I didn't realize just how much I had understated my tiredness, when after I closed my eyes and laid my head against the pillow again, I passed out completely. As I fell deeper into sleep, only a small portion of my consciousness floated on the surface, and I could have sworn, that back in reality, I heard "I love you," carried on the air in the room. Three words, eight letter, that I wasn't sure I actually heard rather than just heard in my head. Whether I did hear them or not, I felt warm, like the chill of the night couldn't reach me now.


	2. Someone please, save me

_I kept seeing Tigerlilys in this dreamscape. A field of never-ending orange, highlighted by the midday sun shone in brilliant shades as I drifted through the beds of flowers. There was no path here, only a constant expanse of beauty as far as I could see in every direction. The only quirk I noticed, was a tree some ways away on a small hill. No fruit hung from its branches littered with dying leaves. What did hang though, were pictures, even from where I was standing I could make out the familiar parchment. _

_My feet were soundless here too, and I wasn't even sure I was walking anymore, rather than floating towards my curiosity. I came up to the darkened brown base, looking up into the foliage of the tree. One branch hung low enough for me to reach, or was it that low so I could reach? Regardless, I reached up a hand, trying to pluck one of the pictures from its hold. One came away easily as I pulled lightly on it, and looking at it, I saw a faded portrait of myself, alone. The rest of the parchment on that branch held nothing but copies of the same photo. _

_I climbed up a little to reach another branch which sat higher, and on this one as well there were only pictures of me, the same one actually. I tried another branch, and found the same, and limb after limb I scoured held nothing but the same picture. The grass was covered in my face as I picked every branch clear of its parchment. _

_I didn't know what this meant, and I picked up one of the pictures again this time seeing something different entirely. There was more of me in this one, my entire body showing above the waist. There was a faint number one scribbled on the bottom. I wondered if there were more like this I had missed, and dropped to my knees so run my hands over the pile, scanning each picture quickly. _

_I found two more before a wind came through and swept the rest from underneath my knees. I reached out desperately to catch the pictures as they fled, swirling and dancing on the breeze carelessly. As I watched them leave, I fell back against the tough bark, and slid down to sit underneath the tree. None of this made any sense, why was I here, what were the pictures for?_

_A second wind came, and stole the three pieces of parchment I was holding out of my grasp, and away with the rest. I watched them as well, going off to join the cloud of paper in the distance. The floated there for a second, before swirling into a vortex and connecting with the ground. But it didn't move, instead I saw that each picture which came to the bottom clung to another, and those ones clung to two more, and those four clung to four more._

_Legs started to form, followed by a torso, and arms, and finally a head. The figure stood there despite the breeze which ruffled several loose pieces of its pseudo-body. Two pieces moved along its face, and opened into eyes, while another creased into a mouth followed by another poking into a nose. The features resembled me in a few ways, but I wasn't entirely sure. _

_It looked right at me for several moments, moving one leg after the other until it was standing at the base of the hill, watching me as I watched it in turn. Its arm extended toward me, and the parchment ruffled and shifted, three pieces moving into its fingers. He motioned for me to take them, and I stood tentatively, this was making no sense, none at all. The three pieces it had were the ones I had found. As I looked at each of them again now, I could see a clearer picture of myself. I looked back up expectantly, as if this figure knew anything that could help. As if he knew what I was thinking, he shook his head, and held out his arm again, the familiar motions shifting more parchment into his grasp, which he once again held out for me, the stack growing larger as my hand came up to take them. _

_On each of the ones I took from him, they were numbered four through forty, and when I had them in my own hand, he held out his other and a string dangled from between two fingers. He dropped it onto my stack, and the thread stitched itself into the sides of the parchment, tying them together into a sort of picture book. _

_I looked at him curiously and made to ask him what I was supposed to do with this, but no sound came, although he understood me regardless. He held up both of his hands and imitated how I was holding the book, and from what he was signing to me, I believe he wanted me to flip through the pages. When I simulated his motion, hearing the flutter of each paper as it snapped past my finger, he nodded, and I brought my hand back to start over, watching each piece of parchment pass my eyes. _

_I was standing there for the first pages, my eyes closing and my arms crossing over my chest. After that I saw something edge into the photo, the unmistakable form of a Tiger coming to stand behind me, and wrapping his arms around my own. From there, he craned his head to my ear, his eyes looking into the ones I was watching him with. _

_His lips moved slowly, as if he wanted me to read them. I had to go back and replay that moment several times until I could finally start making out the words. First he said "I," the second word was difficult for me to read, but I was pretty sure he was mouthing "Love." I had a feeling deep in my chest about what the last word would be, and it was no surprise when I finally saw "you" clearly pass his lips. I went back and flipped through the book one more time, from start to finish, and as I watched the scene play out for the last time. I heard the words._

_He spoke them through the paper, and when he finished, I could see a smile crack onto my lips in the pictures, followed by a purr which vibrated through the book. I wasn't sure which one of us had done that, but I was sure it came from the picture me. I looked so much like myself in there. I looked happy for once, after feeling weighed down for so long._

_I checked to see if the figure who gave me this book was still in front of me. He was, but when I motioned to the book and meant to ask him what this was, he shook his head again, but gave me a smile. With one of his hands, he pointed to his heart, and then pointed to my chest. After that, he repeated his motion for me to flip through the book. _

_He didn't make any sense, and I pointed to my heart as if asking him to clarify what he wanted. He waved his hand for me to watch him, and crouched down, dragging his finger in the grass, drawing the letters w, i, t, and h. with?_

_I raised an eyebrow at him, and he motioned for me to flip through again, a look of frustration flashing over his face. I know he wanted me to see the pictures again, but what did he want me to do about the word "with?" He went through the motion with his hands one more time before pointing to his word on the grass, and then pointed to his chest. _

_He wanted me to see the pictures with my heart? How was I supposed to do that? He wouldn't do anything else after that, and waited for me to try what he wanted me to do. I sighed soundlessly and took a breath, trying to be as calm as possible, and fluttered each piece of parchment through my fingers once more. As each picture passed by this time however, I felt twinges of sadness poke in my chest, followed by excitement as seeing the Tiger, and warmth swell in me. _

_I hadn't felt such a flurry of emotions before, and staggered backwards as my body made me perfectly aware that my heart had understood the message where my head could not. My chest beat like drum, and I could feel each beat clearly through the flesh, breathing deep as I tried to calm myself down. I fell against the tree again, the thumping in my chest growing and growing. _

_When I thought that my heart was finally going to split my body open and escape, I felt a hand come over me, rubbing at the pressure on my chest and soothing it. I opened my eyes, and looked directly into the face of the Tiger from the picture. I recognized him now, it was Tygra, but how did he get here? My picture self was standing behind him, holding up two halves of a ripped picture. The first half had me on it, leaning forward awkwardly. The second piece, was blank, and when I looked at them as a whole, it looked like someone else was supposed to be with me, but had been erased from the scene. _

_The Tygra who had had his hand on my chest drew it back, sitting next to me and smiling, while the picture me walked behind him and put a hand on top of the Tiger's head, looking down at me with a similar smile, the pictures blending together and recoloring themselves. When he had finished changing, he looked almost exactly like me, like a twin. He patted Tygra on the head, and he stood facing the fake me. _

_Both of them had their eyes on me, and made sure I was watching as their bodies closed in on each other. My eyes widened and I could feel myself breaking out into a sweat as their faces came closer and closer together, until their lips met. They kissed and looked at me together, breaking apart when they knew I had seen enough. _

_"What are you trying to tell me? What do you want from me?" I could hear myself speaking now, and my voice echoed through the fields, making the flowers sway as if a summer breeze had crossed over them. The fake me just smiled again and bent down to me, holding out his hand while the tiger did the same. _

_"We want to help you Liono, I am the part of you that wants to save you from yourself, and Tygra, the real one, wants to save you as well, but for the reason you just saw."_

_"But why?"_

_"Why do we want to save you? Do you really want to see what would happen to you if we don't?" Before I could answer, he waved his hand outwards, and the sun disappeared. Dark, evil clouds pooled overheard, and it felt like a chill had overcome the field, the Tigerlilys freezing over into crystalline formations, cracking and breaking until they were nothing but jagged shards. I took in the landscape now, the shattered flowers littering the blackened grass like broken mirrors reflecting my face in millions of facets. _

_Tygra was gone, he had disappeared completely, and the fake me had resumed his form of overlapping parchment pieces. He shook his head, and frowned, pointing to something behind me. I hesitated to turn, and when I did, I saw another me. This one made me jump back in fear, I was pale, sickly pale, and melded awkwardly to the tree, its bark tainted into an obsidian like color. There were no leaves, and even some of the branches had visibly snapped off._

_My gaunt body seemed to float on the surface of the trunk, as if the bark were water. I don't know why I did it, but I held my hand out to try and touch myself like this, to see if I was really as dead as I looked. The flesh was cold when I touched it, and sparked the eyes to open, revealing hollow pits than stared back, contemptuously. A hand came out from the bark and swatted my hand away, followed by a yell that made no sense. He sounded like he was using words, but it was a language I didn't understand. I felt that he was angry, but he was sad as well, consumed by it. _

_I backed away, hoping to escape from this horror, but I was kept there, a hand on my back making me watch as the pale body sunk into the tree, wailing all the while until bark covered the mouth, and then the eyes, submerging the abomination in darkness._

_I wanted to leave now, and looked back over to the fake me to ask him to let me go. When I saw his face though, he shook his head and pointed to the tree._

_"That is what awaits you at the end of this path Liono, this is what Tygra and I want to save you from. You have to trust us, please." he sounded pitiful, his voice reminded me of how my own sounded now.  
><em>

_He held me there for only a few moments longer, making his point with the hideous plant before finally letting me go. I stumbled back and fell into the dark grass, it was like tar and stuck to me, cementing my hands down and unwilling to let me up. I struggled to break free, my body started to sink into the Earth like the pale body had sunk into the tree. _

_I screamed for help, but the other me was gone now, and I was left alone. I couldn't die like this, he hadn't even given me a chance yet. I closed my eyes and prayed for someone to rescue me, that I promised I would let anyone help me, as long as they saved me from this. As soon as the words crossed my mind, I felt a warmth on my shoulders. I shot my eyes open and saw a familiar form standing over me, his arms on my shoulders, shaking me. _

_At first I couldn't hear him, but as I sunk deeper into the darkness, he became clearer, he sounded desperate, and I was desperate to listen. The blackness had engulfed me up to my chest now, and I could feel my heart beating faster and faster as I struggled to listen for what Tygra wanted me to do._

_"wa….p…..wak…u….wake..up….wake up Liono…LIONO!... LIONO!...PLEASE WAKE UP!"_


	3. Heartbeats

My eyes flew open in surprise, I was drenched in sweat, and freezing. I looked around, the first thing I noticed being that there was a Tiger standing over me with a hand on my shoulder and another on my chest. The second thing was that my father was standing at the door, his face contorted into the most worried expression I have ever seen on him. Other than that, everything seemed perfectly normal.

I panted as I tried to catch my breath, pushing Tygra's hands away and sitting up, holding my head when I felt an intense pain shoot behind my eyes and start eating at my nerves. I tried as best I could to wipe the sweat away. Tygra handed me a towel when he saw me and I snatched it, burying my face into the fabric. When I was dry enough, I set the towel down, looked from Tygra to Father, and asked them to leave.

"We cannot leave you alone," Father spoke first, his eyes moving from their previous position into narrowed slits filled with concern yet strength. When he said nothing more, I resolved that I would leave then, if they would not. At the door however, the larger Lion would not budge, even after I excused myself and asked him politely first to move, followed by a more commanding tone.

He just stared at me, his stubbornness and patience winning out over mine. What was I supposed to do now, I couldn't get back to sleep with them here. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I looked out the window over my shoulder and saw the moon hanging low in the sky, its fluorescent aura cascading over the land below, bathing it in rich amethyst light.

"how long until morning?" I asked, hoping that at least I had gotten enough sleep to last the day.

"Night has barely begun, it's still a few hours until midnight." Father replied first, and I turned to him with a disbelieving look. There was no way I had only been asleep for a few hours, that dream should have lasted well into morning. But then again, it WAS a dream, time does not matter, nor does space.

But if there was one thing that mattered, it was what had happened. Tygra caught on to my trance, and asked me what kind of nightmare I had which struck me so badly. I avoided looking at him, and instead laid down on the sheets, still wet from my episode.

He was smart enough not to ask again, but instead pulled a chair up to the side I was laying on, and sat down, watching me with pity, like a child watches a sick pet. I turned over away from him. There was a click at the door:

"Tygra, you watch over him for tonight, would you?"

"I didn't plan on leaving."

I craned my neck to watch Father leave, relieved at least partially that his patience may be longer than mine, but it was still thin at menial issues. Tygra and I were left alone, the silence of the night, broken only by the moonbeetles at the window. Behind my back, I heard him humming, a low, soft tune. I felt I recognized it, and lent an ear in his direction to hear It better.

I felt the melody tug at my heartstrings, but my head would not remember it. I struggled to find some kind of hint, anything I could think of that would catch and grow into the memory I needed. It wouldn't come, and Tygra stood, moving to sit on the edge of the bed, and put a hand on my side, rubbing up and down in soft strokes.

"Do you remember this tune Liono?"

"What are you doing?" I tried swatting his hand away, but he just put it back after every attempt.

"Mother used to sing this to us as children, whenever we were sad…" I heard his voice drop almost to a whisper as he finished, and my mind stuck to his words. I remember very well now that he mentioned her. It's been nearly twelve years since she passed, and I thought I had grieved her loss long enough. But even now, as that one memory of her rocking me in her arms, humming the same tune faded, thousands more flooded into my mind against my will. I saw her with me at the market, and playing in the park. I saw us all eating dinner, I felt the longing to see her again shove every other emotion out of the way. I tried as best I could to contain myself, but the tears still squeezed out.

"I miss her too Liono, every day I think of her, and how much she meant to all of us." Anger pooled inside me as he finished, he wouldn't know that, he has no idea how much she meant not only to Father and I, but to all of Thundaria.

"How do you know how much she meant, you weren't even her son!" I pushed his arm off and sat up, locking with his eyes as I felt anger flow from my head and into my chest. How would he know how I felt, how could he know how it feels to have lost a Mother when he didn't even have one to begin with? She was my Mother, not his, how dare he talk as though he could possibly even attempt to empathize with me?

Tygra took my words, and shook them off, putting a hand on my shoulder, his mahogany eyes never once leaving my own. I could feel my anger degenerating, even if only a little at the frown he wore. It was slight, but it seemed to do something to me, I had never experienced my anger being tore down like this.

"She cared for me as though I was her son, but you are right. Although, now that we have some time, perhaps you could tell me how much she meant to you, so that I'd know from now on." He had looked past me and out the window, checking on the moon to make sure we really had all the time he said we did.

"I don't want to talk about her now, it's been too long, and the past is best left there. You don't even care anyways, so it was pointless for you to ask."

"That isn't true Liono, I care more than you know, I care about you." His words were punctuated with that pity he wore like a second skin. I had been about to shirk him off and lay back down, but he kept a firm grip on my shoulder, and wrapped his other arm around me and held there, making my eyes go wide as I felt the heat of the first hug I had since the day Mother passed.

This was how she used to hug me, an arm over my shoulder, and another wrapped around my waist, with her head rested into my neck. I hated him for doing this to me, but the memories that usurped my thoughts suppressed that anger, and left me with only the sadness I had felt before. I wanted her back, she would know what to tell me to do, about everything. I sniffled at first, feeling my sorrow and grievance push past my borders and escape into the word, in their wake streams of saline and gasps as my body weakened under the stress and fell against the body holding me.

Tygra rocked me as I released all of my stress, humming the same tune she used to hum, hugging me the same way she used to. He may not have been her son, but he was right that she had treated him like one, perhaps he could understand. I was a fool, I was insensitive, he never knew his real Mother, how intense could his longing be, could it be more than mine even?

My head fell into his neck, and I was afraid at first that he'd be mad that I was getting him wet, but when he just tightened his hold on my and rocked me even more gently, I started to feel the thought that maybe he really did care as much as he said tug at my mind. It had been so long since anyone had shown me any affection like this, but that problem is two-sided, it had been so long since I had shown anyone else any affection at all.

"Will you tell me what's wrong?" His voice was calm and soft, and he said it lightly, perfectly. I wasn't sure whether I could or not, but when he got onto the bed, into a position to hold me more securely between his legs, I knew he wouldn't leave until I did. Part of me didn't want him to leave at all, and just told me to be quiet, hoping that he really would stay. I missed these little things, like hugs, like whispers, everything that made me feel like I was cared about.

This Tiger had given me all of those things in such a short time, he overpowered my emotions with his own, but why? My heart was calming as I continued to sob, I started to feel similar to how I felt when Tygra had touched me in the dreamscape. I felt a warmth seep into my body from his own, and the chill I had woken with was pushed away like a gnat. What is happening to me, what is the meaning of all of these things?

"why are you doing this?" I wasn't sure he understood when the words hitched through the tears, but he stopped rocking and pulled his head back to look into my eyes.

"Because I love you." Why did those words make me calmer, but make my cry even more? How long had it been since I heard those words, I couldn't remember. I missed hearing them, and I wanted to hear them again. So even though I heard him clearly the first time:

"What did you say?" I tried wiping the tears away as if trying to make it look like they were preventing me from hearing him, but he didn't care.

"I love you Liono." He embraced me into a hug again and put his head back into my neck, nuzzling deep while he started to rock me again, making I understood him. I couldn't think of anything else coherently enough and just sat there in his embrace, swaying gently with him with the beat of his song. He picked up his voice and sung several of the words, his deep yet smooth vocals resounding in my head and calming the waves of thoughts swelling and crashing against the sides of my mind. I could hear every lyric spoken melodically, each letter charged with his passion.

I had never heard him sing before, so it was quite surprising when he showed me how talented he was. He never stopped moving, but when his song was done, his last words punctuated slowly and quietly, he stopped and tightened his grip around my waist and shoulder, pressing his chest firmly to mine. I could hear his heart beating through our clothes, and I'm sure he could feel mine.

What was going on, why was I letting him do this, and why was he, of all people, doing this? My thoughts immediately went back to my dream, of the kiss my dream form shared with the Tiger, and that Tiger's touch to my heart, how he held me in those pictures. This embrace was similar, even if the only difference was our position. Had it really been so long since I had been loved like this, that I would really let anyone hold me in such an intimate way as this? I did promise I would let anyone help me as long as they rescued me from my nightmare. Tygra did rescue me, so I guess he's earned this if nothing else from me. But…

"What did you save me from?" I had meant to ask myself that question, hoping some remnant of my dream form would answer me. Instead, I had whispered it under my breath, and I hoped the Tiger didn't hear. But he cared more than I knew, he listened to everything that came out of my mouth.

"Yourself."


End file.
